Sabbath

I am off today. I slept in. I am resting.  I am cuddling with my pups.

I have been at the hospital, in the ICU, the last 5 days.

I have been in the room with, talked to, interacted with, and done procedures on patients who are positive for COVID-19.

They are sick, they are not doing well.

We are finding that patients tend to do worse in their second week of illness.

We did not know that. There is so much we do not know.

The increased anxiety has seemed to level out the last few days as we are all settling in to our new normal. People are less panicked and more reasonable. But things are still manageable now, I do not know how it will be when it is not.

We are continuing to try and plan and prepare and learn. We are learning more every day just from simple experience and trial and error.

I am thinking on things differently now. For so long we compared COVID-19 to influenza that I came to assume some things that were not true. I assumed that you get COVID like you get the flu. It comes, you deal with it, it is gone. But I am not sure that is true. We do not know what kind of lasting effects it could have, what kinds of chronic illness it could result in or could be. I dismissed that if I got it I would not die from it, but we do not know that, I do not know that.

I have never been concerned or scared to do my job. But I am becoming more and more aware of how dangerous and deadly this is. I will continue to do my job but not without concern.

People must continue to stay home. People can be contagious for up to 5 days before showing symptoms.

I fear it will be many months before this is over. I believe we need to quarantine for a long time to keep safe and to keep this at bay. I believe we are still only in the beginning stages of this virus in our area.

I have plenty of food and toilet paper and electricity and entertainment.

I have a phenomenal dog walker who caters to my pups and is so incredibly supportive of me.

I have good friends and family who are checking in and offering prayers and encouraging texts and messages and sending love.

I have dear ones who have sewn masks and left them on my door step.

Part of me wants to be at work today. Part of me knows I need time off to rest and recharge. Part of me is confused by the reality of what is happening.

All of me is thankful for a steadfast God above.