Turning 40: Notes to My Younger Self. #15 Confession

#15. Confession

Community is so powerful and so beautiful.

Community is so important. Having a support system is so important. We need people to love us and encourage us and to build us up.

Once we have true community, one of our biggest fears can be of losing that community, of being unwanted.

Often times, this fear is so powerful that it leads us to secrecy and to shame. We are so afraid of truth, of other people’s perceptions, of being unwanted that we hide within ourselves.

But that hiding results in loneliness, isolation, pain, shame, and fear. The longer we hide, the longer these negative attributes grow and the more isolated we feel.

We fear so much, that we begin to live so little. 

True community is having true fellowship. True community is being free to be authentic and vulnerable and loved.

We read in the book of James, that we should confess our sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed.

Being healed is the removal of shame, the removal of loneliness, the removal of secrecy, the removal of self-loathing.

The act of confession is an act of self-disclosure for the purpose of being known, of being seen, of being connected and committed to community. We confess our faith. We confess our feelings. We confess our fears. We confess our hurts. We confess our pains. We confess our hopes. We confess our loves. And yes, we confess our sins.

Confession is about life, about healing, about truth. Confession is about being known. Confession is about being authentically loved.

Many years ago, I slowly began to understand the value of confession. Little by little I began to trust and grow that most vital support system. So much of that support system grew out of confession, vulnerability, and love.  

I wish we had not waited to be so bold, but I am so grateful that we did.